14. Becoming a Crew

The very first thing you need to do when becoming a crew is establish the ground rules (some basic guidelines are at the end of this post). Communicate with your crew and make sure you’re all on the same page.

This means you need to be in a crew of other community guys. You cannot just hang out with your normal guy friends and expect them to be effective wingmen. These need to be guys that understand pickup the same way you do, and with whom you can openly talk strategy.

Woo Girls

Everyone has seen these girls. It’s a group of girls and they make a ton of noise. Screeching high voices that get way too excited over their wine, cosmos and fruity shots. Woooooo!!!!!!! Annoying as hell.

And there’s a lot to learn from them.

As obnoxious as this girls are, they are bringing the party. It doesn’t matter if they’re all average looking, if you are in their proximity they are the hottest, smartest, funniest, most successful awesome women in the world because they own that space and their frame is strong.

Learn from them and emulate their frame dominance. Be loud. Not loud enough to actually annoy people and risk getting thrown out, but about 30% more than a normal conversation level. Laugh at every joke. Everything your crew says is awesome. Just being out with people is not enough to establish social proof. The people you’re with need to be a fun, high energy group of alphas.

Being loud enough to hear not only raises your group’s social proof, it also is a form of peacocking. Any girls interested in hanging out with you will now get lots of opportunities to jump into the conversation.

Neutralize Obstacles

This is so simple, and so obvious, but it’s easy to get caught up in the moment and forget what you’re actually supposed to be doing as a wing. Identify the obstacles and neutralize them.

When first opening a group, you’ll want to keep the whole group engaged, but as you see your buddy progressing and ready to isolate, it’s your time to draw the attention of everyone else. In addition to keeping them all talking and paying attention to you, try to reposition yourself to physically isolate your buddy and his target from the rest of the group.

When your buddy is being interrupted, interrupt the interrupter. Another dude comes in and starts talking to the girl, you start talking to the other dude. The mother hen comes in and wants to drag her friend away, you talk to the mother hen.


I’ve heard it said that the three most over-hyped things are champagne, lobsters, and anal. They’re none of them bad — they just don’t live up to the hype. Wingwomen are not like that. They’re actually bad.

Not all, of course, but most are terrible. They think “there’s a girl” is solid game, and “go talk to her” is some next-level shit. They don’t understand what will attract women because we’re all typically pretty bad about being honest with ourselves about what we want and what attracts us. A woman would tell you that push/pull would never work, but of course it always works.

Women are also bad wings because they’ve never seen the mechanics from the other side. They’ve been in the audience in the magic show, but that doesn’t tell them anything about the trap doors and deck switches that are being used.

Now all that aside, if you have a cool female friend who does understand the fundamentals of pickup, she is going to be a very strong member of your crew. Women are immune to the bitch shield and auto-reject instincts of other women. They fly in under the radar, and they are extremely powerful at neutralizing obstacles.

Rules for Being a Good Wingman

Whoever opens has dibs on the target.

Don’t get greedy calling dibs on more than one girl. Don’t call dibs if you’re not going to pursue her.

Never go after a girl your mate is after. And he decides when his attempt is over, not you.

Be on time to the venue.

Tell your wing if you’re leaving. Minimum send a text.

Always act with respect towards your crew.

Stay positive.

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